Monday, May 21, 2012

3rd Round of Clomid

Well here I am again, yet another round of clomid. This time I'm doing the 50mg days 3-7, today is day 7. Also going to try preseed, softcups, and mucinex (last month cm was nonexistant). Fingers crossed and lots of prayers that I ovulate on Saturday instead of Sunday or Monday. Hubby will probably leave Thurs night :-( sob... I am just so discouraged and down at this point I almost want to give up. But every time I see a baby or a pregnant belly the fire is fanned once again. I'm soo tired of disappointment and knowing that there's no possible way for us to be together the day that I ovulate because of his work schedule and now once again because my cycle lasted 2 extra days last month. I can't even describe how frustrating it is!

I've decided to plan a vacation. My counselor I've been seeing (will update on that too) thinks I need one. I know I need one. Have for a long time considering I haven't had a real vacation in several years. We've gone on weekend trips but never anything far away or more than 2 days so a 4-5 day vaca somewhere either in the mountains or on the beach sounds really great! And hopefully I can time it around my next clomid cycle (praying I won't need another one!) and if that one doesn't work we'll move on to IUI. And what's so crazy and downright unfair is that if our schedules were straight, we would have already conceived by now so having to do IUI will be so nerve-wracking!

This last week was my second appt with the counselor. Can't say I'm seeing any progress but maybe that's just because I'm only in my second week! I'm not totally comfortable with her, it's kind of unnerving because I almost feel like she's judging me because I'm a Christian. She, btw, is supposed to be a Christian counselor but I'm not sensing that she is a christian, just that maybe that's something she's qualified to do is give objective christian advice even though she doesn't share the faith. I dunno. Maybe I'm just reading that and I'm mistaken but I'll keep going until I feel that I can't anymore. I'm hoping next week will yield some progress.

Well that's all I have for now. sigh...I'm so enthused can you tell??

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